Ministry Overload

We knew this would be a challenge when we got married, but the past month has been a greater challenge than we ever expected.

With Ryan and I both working in ministry...two different ministries...and with both of us trying to be involved in the other's ministry (because ministry is a good thing), we have become overloaded very quickly.

Notice the trend in that sentence? Ministry...ministry...ministry...ministry.

It's such a good thing, and we both love and feel called to what we're doing, but it can wear you out.

The past month has been full of church planting vision trips, budget planning meetings, trip debriefs, trip planning meetings, fellowship dinners, outreach events, outreach planning, life groups, mentorship appointments, international student lunches, and more...all on top of the usual 7 or 8-5 work schedule and regular church services.

Oh, and all of that on top of marriage. Or is it marriage on top of all of that?

That's the problem. Where do WE fit into all of those good things? People are constantly asking us, "how's married life?" or introducing as as "the newlyweds." Wait. Oh yeah...we're still technically newlyweds. Where has the time gone?

Where were all of the fun date nights and evenings at home curled up on the couch watching a movie? When did those happen?

Oh right. We had to cancel them because of ministry.

I'm not complaining. Really, I'm not. I love what God has called us to and am grateful that we and our home can be used for the spread of the Gospel and God's glory.

But I'm not going to fake it either. This is hard.

I miss fun. I miss simplicity. I miss rest.

And that's why they call it sanctification. It wasn't meant to be easy. It wasn't meant to be fun, or simple or peaceful. It was meant for the glory of God and my joy.

My joy.

Am I seeking that joy? Am I choosing that joy? Am I reaping the rewards that God longs to give me as I willingly and joyfully serve him?

That's more than a rhetorical question. That's a question that, when answered honestly, demands action.

That action is a change of my heart.

planes are like babies...

My fear of flying is much like my fear of giving birth.

When the process starts, I remind myself over and over that people do this all of the time without any problems at all. It's a pretty natural thing. That should comfort me and I should be perfectly fine.

But I'm not.

I'm not perfectly fine because there have been a few (comparatively speaking) instances where it went wrong. It would only have taken one mishap for me to be frightened. A few mishaps have been enough to make me terrified.

Most likely, when I get on a plane tomorrow morning, I'm going to go through all of this in my mind. Most likely, I'll arrive at my destination in normal fashion. But I'm still going to be scared to get on the next plane.

When Trials Should Come...

Though Satan should buffet,

Thought trials should come,

Let this blessed assurance control:

That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,

and has shed His own blood for my soul.

 This has been the longest 12-day stretch of my life, I think. It's been 12 days of pain, mental and physical exhaustion, desperation and spiritual warfare. I feel like such a weakling to use words like that, but it's really been hard.

It all started while on vacation in Saint Louis, on our last full day there and during the meal I had been looking forward to the most. I was almost finished with my grilled chicken sandwich when I choked on a normal-sized bite. That's happened before, regularly in fact since the first of the year, so aside from being embarrassed and a bit scared for the moment, I didn't think much of it.

But then dinner came and I couldn't swallow anything. Not even ice cream. I was up most of the night in dreadful pain because I couldn't swallow well and because I was having abnormally bad acid reflux (I've dealt with this for years now). I knew that I just needed to get some rest and the next day would be okay, and I finally fell asleep.

But then Sunday came...and I couldn't eat breakfast, or lunch...or dinner. It's hard to explain, but I just couldn't swallow. This led to a starvation diet of sorts for a couple of days until I succumbed to seeing the doctor. Their first thought was that it was an issue with my gallbladder, so we did an ultrasound on that. Normal.

Okay, so let's try some ulcer (heavy antacid) medication. Oops...allergic reaction that results in a panic attack that results in my first-ever visit to the emergency room. That was humbling on so many levels. Once again, everything checks out okay, so the doctor recommends a scope of my esophagus.

There was a lot of "red tape" of sorts to get the scope scheduled, so it was a week later before we got to do that. Oh my. My heart rate was above 130 before they started. I was terrified. I would rather have any other surgery, I think, than have someone stick a tube down my throat. My mouth is tiny as it is and there is no room for anything unusual in there. Goodness, even my tonsils got kicked out a few years ago. :-)

The anesthesia worked perfectly for a few minutes but then I woke up right in the middle of the procedure. I remember trying to push them away and gagging uncontrollably (attractive, right?) before I guess they gave me even more gas. The doctor told my mom later that they gave me as much as possible while still allowing me to breathe on my own. I guess everything went okay after that, as the next thing I remember was seeing my mom and Ryan walk into my little curtained area.

Doctor: "I can't find anything wrong."
Delirious Me: "You can't find anything right?"
Doctor: "No, I can't find anything wrong. You're completely normal."

At this point I start weeping uncontrollably. I couldn't even talk. Ryan tried to explain to the doctor for me that I was just devastated because I fully expected the problem to be resolved that day, or at least that the problem would make itself known. He assured us that he didn't see anything, but that he was going to schedule a Barium swallow for Friday to see if perhaps there was a muscle issue affecting my ability to swallow. I couldn't do anything but cry for several minutes. I've lost 10 pounds at this point.Something is wrong.

Strangely enough, I was able to eat that night. All I can say is that it is the abundant grace of God that He allowed that when I needed it most. It was such a blessed gift to me that evening.

Wednesday morning came, though, and I couldn't eat again. I made a big mistake and tried to start with oranges, which I think really messed me up because of their acidity. Another day with little to no food. Desperation is setting in.

Today has been a better day. I've decided to try taking an over-the-counter antacid every day for a bit in hopes of healing my esophagus from damage caused from acid reflux. It's all I know to try right now, in addition to taming my diet considerably. Tomorrow we will do the Barium swallow (which I'm not hearing rave review about, but after the scope, I think I can handle most anything) and see what that shows.

So that's where we're at. I've been able to eat a bit today and that's encouraging, but I still feel like I'm searching for answers to a problem I never expected to face. This whole experience has given me so many lessons that will no doubt stick with me longer than this issue will. This post is already long, but it's been a while, so please indulge me if you can.

1- I place way too much value on food. If going without it for 12-ish days makes me this miserable mentally as well as physically, it's something I am far too dependent on. That's very different now.

2- Food may help me live, but it's not what gives me life. The Word of God is my Bread of life. Jesus is my satisfaction. God has already taken me from death to life. Food is merely a gift from Him to provide for a physical need - it does nothing for my soul.

3- My husband really loves me. I've known this, but to hear him say he would take this in my place, or even rather die than to see my suffer, that means something. The fact that he has been patient in my exhaustion and lack of interest in cooking food that I can't eat is pretty special, too.

4- I don't need nearly as much food as I think I do. An Ensure milkshake really is enough to get me through lunch. I don't need a biggie sized fry, hamburger and diet coke (oh, the irony) to get me to dinner.

5- There are much greater problems that I could be facing. Many people around the world are hungry because they have no food, not because they can't swallow for a season. Do I care as much as I want people to care about me right now?

6- God is bigger than any of this. He could remove it from me in an instant, but He has chosen not to at this time. Somehow, He can receive more glory through this than through a 'healthy' me. I've seen some proof of that so far, but so much of it I just have to trust. I might not ever understand, but I have to accept.

Where does all of that leave me? Humbled. Thankful. Changed. Well.

It is well with my soul.

It is well, it is well with my soul.

It's Been A While...

Is there a blogger out there that doesn't apologize for long gaps between posts? If so, I'm not following them.

So there's the apology...here's the excuse. We moved. I really expected it to be an easy task since we had so much time (more than a month) to get it done. What I didn't realize, though, is that once you get to a certain point, you have to choose one place to live and it no longer works to move a little at a time. You can't have your kitchen in one place and your clothes in another. That just doesn't make sense. So, with the help of my parents and some unusually helpful brothers, we did it in two days. We found out later that if we had finished a day earlier, we would've gotten half a month's rent back. That's another story that probably shouldn't be told, though. Too much bitterness. Let's just say no Burnses or Martins will rent from Lindsey Management ever again.

Moving did a tricky number on my emotions, much to my surprise. I had been so eager to have a house and just get it done, but once we locked the apartment for the last time, I teared up a bit. A lot of really great things happened there. A lot of really hard things happened there, too. But they all changed me, grew me, developed my marriage. It was sad to think that we were leaving our first home together behind, probably never to see it again. It was even more sad to know that this weekend, a man will be moving in there that just left his wife. That was hard for me to swallow. That apartment housed the beginning of our marriage and will now house the end of another marriage. Heartbreaking. All in all, it was just a sad experience to leave that stage of life.

It's been such a joy at the same time, though, to have our first "home" home together. We've gotten stressed out over things like hanging curtains and landscaping, but we've loved every minute of it. We've done it together. We can picture a baby or two running around in the back yard and sleeping in the front bedroom. We look forward to Ryan's parents seeing it for the first time and having friends over for dinner. It's a special time in our lives that I wouldn't want to trade.

It's just a lot of emotions...really even hard to put into words. In case I forget to blog for a while and you lose me, I'll be easy to find. I'll be the one laughing and crying and laughing again.

How to Get from Point A to Point B

So...it's official. Ryan & Rebekah Martin are buying a house. Very scary and adult-ish, but we're overwhelming thankful. Here's how it's played out so far.

Ryan's parents have offered us a down-payment that is a gift as long as we are in a house. If we moved cities someday and went back to apartment living, we give it back. If we leave the country for missional purposes and sell the house, we give it back. Until one of those things would happen, though, it's a huge blessing to us. I think they really want us in a house...perhaps so that we have more than an air mattress to offer them when they come to visit!

We looked at what seemed like a hundred houses last summer, and three times as many listings. Back then we weren't married yet, so it was a lot harder guessing what our joint budget would be and what sort of room we needed, etc. We were naive and excited at the thought, though, so we looked a lot. We ended up finding one house that we really liked...it was a bit small, but we were just going to be newlyweds, so we didn't need much. Then one day my grandmother drove by and happened to notice that the house right next to it was for sale and open. She went inside and fell in love with the house. We went to look at it and also fell in love. After looking at it several times and working through the budget, we were ready to make an offer. Then the phone call came one Sunday afternoon..."someone else just bought the house."

We were devastated. We thought about pursuing the neighboring house again, but just didn't think we could deal with driving by our "dream house" every day on the way to our second choice. End of house search. Apartment lease signed.

A year goes by and we decide to start looking again since the apartment lease would be up soon and we were really getting tired of neighbors who smoked and rapped and who knows what else (side note: it's a GREAT apartment complex...we just got some bad luck with neighbors). Since I work with our realtor, we started looking for fun, which turned into looking for real. Once again, we looked at way too many of them.

One weekend after two days of driving around and looking online, only to find that every single option was bad for one reason or another, I broke down. "We're just not going to find any house that has everything we need in a good neighborhood on our budget." I was done looking. I would rather stay in our apartment for another year than look at any more houses. That was Saturday afternoon.

On Saturday night, I got an e-mail. I guess I had randomly entered my e-mail address on a real estate site in order to look at some listings the day before, and they decided to send me some more. Remember, I was done looking. Done-zo. No way was I going to go to another homes.com website again. But since they were nice enough to send me the e-mail...I guess I can look.

And there it was. A beautiful home that looked like it had everything we could have dreamed of. And at that price? Really? There must be a catch. Don't get your hopes up, kiddo. But it won't hurt to take a look.

Sunday night, our agent was able to get us in after tracking down a key from elsewhere in the neighborhood. First impression: it's perfect. If we don't buy it, it's not because it's not the perfect house...it's because we're not ready to buy one. We committed to pray seriously through that specific house, though, for a week. Several times I walked in on my husband on his hands and knees praying...such a special treat for a wife to see her husband leading that way. We spent a lot of time in conversation with his parents, giving them "Skype" tours with pictures and Google maps. Every conversation gave us more and more peace. Finally, Friday arrived (it seemed like forever!) and we showed the house to my parents. They loved it too. I started getting really excited.

So one week later on the following Sunday, we decided to make the final call before midnight. At 10:28pm I sent a message to our agent letting her know that we wanted to make an offer. The whole 22.5 hours before that were full of prayer, discussion and more prayer. After that message was sent, though, we both had a giddy peace about the decision.

Monday morning, we made an offer for $5,300 less than the asking price, PLUS we asked them to pay $3,060 in closing costs. With it being a HUD home and our agent knowing the process they typically follow, we fully expected to receive a counter offer from them on Tuesday morning, which would then allow us to make another offer and finalize the deal on Wednesday. Much to our surprise, the message Tuesday morning was that they had ACCEPTED our first offer! Such a shock to all of us...the house values for about $25,000 more than we're paying for it. It was so affirming from the Lord to have them accept the offer in such an unprecedented way, so that was an added blessing.

Now all we have to do is sign some papers and the ball really starts rolling. Our agent is going to California to get married and honeymoon next Friday, so we'll have to do the inspection early next week, if not the end of this week. It's all happening so fast! We expect to close in the next 30-45 days, which means we'll have about a month to get the house painted and move things in slowly so that it's not super stressful on the actual moving day.

God is so good. I can't stop saying that enough. A wise woman told me recently that in their house-buying process, God had to really break her of craving the house as a possession and then bring her to a point of just being grateful for His provision in HIS timing. I pray that that is true of my own heart so that HE alone will receive every bit of the glory.

The Latest...

I feel like there's not much going on around here, and yet I still seem to be so busy. A few updates on life...

We still haven't found a house. We're looking, but because we're in a place of not having to move, we're more motivated to wait until we find exactly what we want. I'm realizing that dream may not exist, but I'd at least like to find something that we could stand to live in for 10 years if we needed to. We have about another month before we need to decide one way or the other, so we keep plodding along.

Now that summer is here and we're home more in the evenings, I'm becoming more domestic. Planning meals for the whole week and cooking multi-dish dinners has been fun. It's so much easier to eat healthier when you're cooking your own meals and not eating dinner on the go. I enjoy how much Ryan loves it, too. :-)

Speaking of eating healthier, after a week of vacationing/eating out, I got home to find I had gained more weight than I care to admit. It turns out the scale was actually off, but I had still gained. The number I saw on the incorrect weigh-in is what I call my "breaking point." When I see that number, I have no choice but to do something about it. Perfect timing for meal-planning...it's been three days and so far, so good. It's amazing how even drinking more water will give me more energy. Let's hope this sticks...and that the pounds don't.

My chiropractor visits are helping my back and neck a lot. I'm tired of having that routine of going every day after work because it shortens my evening, but I really do feel like it's worth it. Just a couple more weeks of it and then I will be done. They'll probably tell me that I need to keep coming back regularly for maintenance, but I can't afford the time or money for that. I'll be content to just be able to sleep pain-free at night.

I've fallen behind in my Bible reading. I'm not really sure what happened, but I've got to catch up. Today's reading is the whole Song of Solomon...and my dear husband told me this morning it reads much differently to him than it did last year. Something about marriage changing his view of the book... :-)

It's my last day of work this week, but I am exhausted at the idea of nine more hours to go today, including a staff meeting. I didn't like being here by myself for two weeks, but it's been overwhelming to have everyone back this week. I am learning to cherish my hour and a half each day in the mornings before the rest of the staff arrives!

Speaking of which, time to get back to work...

The Funny Things in Life

We have a trash can that doesn't fit regular-sized trash bags easily. The ones that fit perfectly, though, are way too expensive to buy. I figured out how to make the regular bags fit...you just have to wrap it tightly and fold some things over. It's really not that bad, but I guess Ryan feels like I've mastered it and he can't figure it out. He came home for lunch today and took the trash out... then I found this waiting on me. I'm glad I'm good for something. :-)

The Great House Hunt

Looking at buying a house for the first time has to be one of the most stressful things two people can do together! We're just really getting started, and already I'm wondering if maybe the apartment life is really the best option for us for another year. :-)

We looked at several houses last year, even before we were "officially" engaged, but God made it pretty clear to us that we needed to wait on that for a least a year. Well, it's time again. Our lease isn't up until the end of August, but with the whole timeline that's involved, we really need to start seriously looking in order to potentially make an offer around early June. Exciting? Yes. Overwhelming? You betcha.

One of the girls I work with is a part-time realtor as well, so she and I browse through listings once or twice a week. We found one that we liked a lot in the online pictures in what we call our "old neighborhood." Last year, there was a house in this neighborhood that we were soooo close to making an offer on before somebody else came out of nowhere and bought it outright. Anyway, the house for sale there this year went under contract the day after we saw it online. Our "old neighborhood" seems to be somewhat unlucky for us!

Take 2 - my mom drove through a neighborhood in Springdale that looked really promising, and we looked at a couple of houses there last weekend. On the outside, they're beautiful. On the inside, total dumps. Also, when every other house is for sale in the neighborhood, and mostly on short sales (meaning they're near foreclosure), it doesn't feel like a long-term neighborhood potential for us as a family.

Take 3 - our first promising option! We looked at a house in the Johnson area on Saturday morning. It's bank-owned, so we'd have to buy it as-is, but it seems to only need paint (in every single room) and new carpet. This one feels a slight bit out of our price range, but if we can end up getting it down some, it could be a house that would last us 10-15 years because of the size and neighborhood. I love this house, but we felt like we needed to see some other viable options before declaring it a go.

Take 4 - we ran across a good-looking listing online, and as it turns out, it's owned by a dear member of our church. We looked at it last night, and while I really love the house, it's lacking quite a bit in terms of the neighborhood. The area is okay right now, but seems to be declining quickly. Still, it was really good to see another good option to compare to the Johnson house.

So that's where we're at right now. The hardest part of the whole process is that Ryan's parents are 8 1/2 hours away, and pictures can only do so good. We are so blessed to have them wanting to put down a down-payment for us on the house, so we really want to involve them as much as possible in the search. My parents are certainly helpful in that, as they can offer a home-owner's perspective to his parents that we aren't able to give.

This is certainly a process of great faith! I'm eager to see how God works in our hearts the whole way...and eager to have some extra living space so that we can start planning for babies to fill it. :-)

It's Only Water...

Three of these a day should be easy!

I wish I knew why it is so difficult for me to do something as simple as drinking water every day. I'm constantly thirsty, but for some reason I always resort to diet sodas rather than than the water that would really satisfy my thirst.

I've been going to see a chiropractor for the past week or so because of terrible pain in my back and neck, and he's been pressuring me about drinking more water as well.

Then my mom recommended I look at the "diet manager" available for free on WebMD. It's almost exactly like the WeightWatchers program, only it's much more cost-effective!! My mom and I did WW together several  years ago, and it was highly beneficial for both of us, but then we tried to manage it on our own without paying for the program and the weight slowly started coming back. Anyway, I figured I'd give it a go again....and there in bold print once again on the food logging screen it was harping about drinking 64 ounces of water a day.

I guess I should give commitment to this a go. I'll feel so much better, save money, avoid nagging, and feel a sense of accomplishment.

There's a good spiritual lesson in there, too, I think. Just translate:

"I'm constantly thirsty, but for some reason I always resort to diet sodas rather than than the water that would really satisfy my thirst"

to

"I'm constantly thirsty, but for some reason I always resort to sinful cravings rather than the true Living Water Who would really satisfy my thirst."

Perhaps drinking more physical water daily will serve as a reminder to go to the spiritual Water more consistently.

Sorrowful, Yet Always Rejoicing

Sunday, May 1
9:15pm

I read on Twitter that the President was scheduled to speak at 9:30 and that we had no idea why. I was intrigued. I asked Ryan to switch over to Fox News.

9:25pm

My heart was racing. Geraldo Rivera was telling us that this kind of announcement was unprecedented and that it was a major development in the national security of the United States. Ryan checked my pulse. I was seriously getting nervous about what this was and how it might change my life.

9:42pm

I saw a teenager's post on Facebook declaring that Osama Bin Laden was dead. I assumed it was a joke, but then saw reports start to come in that it was official. My heart rate immediately calmed down, but then the thoughts started racing instead.

10:00pm

Thought process: Why are we rejoicing in the death of a unbeliever? Would the same people who pumped their fists at Bin Laden's death not mourn even my death? Bin Laden was no greater sinner than I in the eyes of God, even though in the eyes of the world he was a "monster." I remember so clearly sitting in my room soon after he was declared the villain behind 9/11 and weeping in prayer for this man. I desperately longed for his redemption, and mourn tonight assuming that he will face eternal damnation. Why is the world rejoicing over this?

10:05pm

I have a heart-to-heart with my husband, who tries to understand, interpret and explain my feelings. Thankfully, we started seeing Tweets and Facebook posts from those wiser than us. For example, from Dr. Russell Moore: "The sword of justice, when exercised justly, is a minister of God's righteousness. Rom. 13."

10:15pm

I am choosing to find my joy in the justice and righteousness of God being put on display throughout the world right now. I am sorrowful in the death of an unbelieving sinner, just as would be the case with the death of any unbelieving sinner. I have wept because of the actions of one man, Osama Bin Laden, actions that cost the lives of thousands of men and women, and I weep now at the price he will pay eternally for his own sin; however, I will forever rejoice in the one act of one Man, Jesus Christ, an act that cost Him everything but that saved my life and the lives of each and every one of His children from suffering the penalty of our sins.

I am sorrowful, yet I will always be rejoicing.

On Again, Off Again

My cooking skills are as inconsistent as the Razorback baseball team right now. It's either really good, or fails late in the 9th inning. Perfect example is below:

What began as a perfectly beautiful skillet full of okra, yellow squash and onions...

Ended up as a horrible gooey mess of vegetables and charred remains of vegetables.

I love fried okra and squash, and I've seen my mom fry it many times. For some reason, though, I never noticed that she began with grease. Lesson learned: critical ingredient.

At least the barbecued chicken and rice was good. We have leftover dessert made by a wonderful cook and dear friend...the perfect way to nurse my pride. :-)

Solely Satisfied

What satisfies my soul? I mean really, at this moment in my life, what would make me say, "I am so satisfied."

Sadly, if I was being honest, I would often say food, pleasure, entertainment, a job well done, etc. Which is why Psalm 63 really hit me today as I read what I should have read yesterday.

"My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food, and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips, when I remember you upon my bed, and meditate on you in the watches of the night; for you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for you." (v. 5-7)

Ouch. In fact, double ouch.

Not only should my soul be satisfied in God, for Whom it should thirst (v.1), but it should be satisfied just as much and even so much more than I would ever think I'm satisfied by the sweetness of food. And it's a lasting satisfaction ... "I will bless you as long as I live" (v.4). No food, pleasure, entertainment or job would ever give me a satisfaction that would cause me to praise it for as long as I live!

Now here's where the double ouch happened...

The last couple of nights have been really long for me. I tend to panic a bit internally at bedtime, especially if I had some extra caffeine or maybe something I ate didn't sit right. If I don't feel like I'm breathing normally, or if I'm worried that I'll be awake after Ryan is asleep, or if the wind is blowing a bit too strongly outside, I'm awake in my bed for hours. I'm meditating during those watches of the night, but definitely not on God. I'm meditating on myself, and on what satisfaction I think my husband or my own health or even my own safety will provide. But God has been my help! I should treasure those times of meditating on HIM! Times of great joy while dwelling in the shadow of His wings!

My time in the Word has become a treasure this year as I've made myself stay faithful to it, but it's also been really challenging. I want to be solely satisfied, "souly satisfied," in Him, and it should be so easy, but it's such a struggle.

Data Review Meeting Tomorrow

We'll be meeting with a small team of UBC folks tomorrow morning to review all of our survey data from the Northeast Church Planting trip. I'm looking forward to hearing their thoughts and sharing once again what we learned, but before then there's much to do. This is the first time (aside from a visit from Ryan's parents) that we've had guests in our home for a meal, so the pressure is on.

1. Sleep...soon.
2. Wake up. (This is definitely the most challenging task.)
3. Make pigs in a blanket.
4. Bake muffins.
5. Wash, cut and arrange fruit.
6. Open another box of dishes and set the table.
7. Get dressed. (Just being honest...it will probably take this long to do it.)
8. Plate yogurt, fruit and baked goods.
9. Brew coffee.
10. Fry bacon.
11. Scramble eggs.
12. Put salt and pepper on the table. (I ALWAYS forget to do this since I grew up not using it.)
13. Play hostess.
14. Compose thoughts for sharing memories from a month ago.

I'm worn out just thinking about it! Timing is my biggest issue in the kitchen, so hopefully with Ryan's help I can get it all down and serve it at the right time and temperature. I'm getting much better and grateful for continued opportunities to improve my skills in the kitchen!

A Lesson in Wifery

I've been planning to try a new recipe for a few weeks since we accidentally bought some kielbasa and had to find a way to use it. It was only supposed to take 30 minutes, but of course ended up taking longer. It looked beautiful in the pan, and I thought it tasted pretty good, but Ryan just said it was "different."

This was the first time that he just didn't like a recipe. I've messed some up before, but made them again and they were fine. This time, he just didn't really like it. It was a hard thing for me to accept internally because I had worked so hard on it and planned it for so long. I think the hardest part was knowing this might happen again, especially since I don't plan on cooking the same five meals for the rest of my life!

I've seen it happen many times in my parents' marriage, but I always assumed it would never happen to me. Five and a half months in, though, that assumption was destroyed. It's not anything life-changing by any means, but yet another lesson in being a wife that came unexpectedly.

How's married life, you ask? Sanctifying.

My Own Tsunami

 I spent 20 minutes this morning watching this video about believers in Japan who are dealing with life after a massive earthquake and tsunami. God used it in a powerfully convicting way for me, hitting me with a force similar to that of a tsunami, as I listened to these men cry out to God in terror, in hope, in faith, in awe of the One they know is their only satisfaction and strength.

I've often wondered what would prompt a psalmist like David to say some of the things he said to God. There are Psalms where it seems he is crying out in anger, and I've thought a lot about what righteous anger means. There's a man praying in this video with that kind of anger. He shouts his prayers in a way that would create an uprising in many of our churches, but watching him grow weak and weep at the conclusion of the prayer, it made sense.

"I am weary with my moaning; every night I flood my bed with tears; I drench my couch with my weeping. My eye wastes away because of my grief; it grows weak because of all my foes." (Psalm 6:7)

This guy knows what that feels like. He's experienced those very things, and he doesn't understand why God has allowed this kind of grief. His heart cries out that emotion to God, but in a way that expresses clearly that he knows the Lord hears and cares deeply for His children. He's angry at the sorrow that his church is experiencing, and yet God remains the only One to Whom he can turn. God alone can rescue those people in their distress and in their sin. It's a powerful testimony of one who has lost everything and yet has never lost faith in His Creator.

An Easy Choice?

We read Proverbs 11 as a staff today, and I have to say, I love how clear the Proverbs make it for us sometimes. This particular Proverb presents a choice, and rather than leaving us to make a blind decision, the writer answers every question we might ask when making such an important selection. Let's take a look.

Righteousness v. Wickedness

1) A false balance is an abomination to the Lord. A just weight is his delight. (1-0 Righteouness)
2) Pride comes with disgrace. The humble get wisdom. (2-0 Righteousness)
3) Integrity guides the upright. Crookedness destroys the treacherous. (3-0 Righteousness)
4) Riches do not profit. Righteousness delivers from death. (4-0 Righteousness)
5) Righteousness keeps the blameless' way straight. The wicked fall by their own wickedness. (5-0 Righteousness)
6) Righteousness delivers the upright. The treacherous are taken captive by their own lust. (6-0 Righteousness)
7) Wicked dies = hope and wealth perishes. (7-0 Righteousness)
8) Righteous are delivered from trouble. Wicked walks into trouble (8-0 Righteousness)
9) Godless man destroys his neighbor with his mouth. Righteous are delivered by knowledge. (9-0 Righteousness)
10) Righteous does well = city rejoices. Wicked perish = shouts of gladness. (10-0 Righteousness ... people are cheering for them now)
11) A blessing of the upright exalts a city. The mouth of the wicked overthrows a city. (11-0 Righteousness)


...that continues throughout the entire Proverb! A spoiler for you, Wickedness never scores a single point. It's such an easy choice! There should be no competition, and yet for some reason (sin), we always think the underdog might really be the better choice. NEVER!

Choose Righteousness!!

The Cycle of Misery

You know how there's that one Sunday school lesson that sticks with you for years? I've got one. I don't know why this is the one that keeps staying around, as there wasn't anything particularly meaningful about it at the time, but I think about it often.

It was "the cycle of misery" lesson.

I just finished reading through the book of Judges this morning. It's probably the first time I've actually made it all of the way through on schedule, and doing so made that cycle of misery stick out. Take a look:

2:2 - "But you have not obeyed my voice. What is this you have done?"
2:4-5 - "the people lifted up their voice and wept...and they sacrificed there to the Lord"
2:11 - "and the people of Israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord and served the Baals"
2:18 - "the Lord was moved to pity by their groaning because of those who afflicted and oppressed them"
2:19 - "they turned back and were more corrupt than their fathers"
3:9 - "when the people of Israel cried out to the Lord, the Lord raised up a deliverer for the people of Israel"
3:12 - "the people of Israel again did what was evil in the sight of the Lord"
3:15 - "then the people of Israel cried out to the Lord, and the Lord raised up for them a deliverer"
4:1 - "and the people of Israel again did what was evil the sight of the Lord"
4:3 - "then the people of Israel cried out to the Lord for help"
6:1 - "the people of Israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord"
6:6 - "the people of Israel cried out for help to the Lord"
8:33 - "the people of Israel turned again and whored after the Baals and made Baal-berith their god"
10:10 - "the people of Israel cried out to the Lord"
13:1 - "and the people of Israel again did what was evil in the sight of the Lord"

What a sad, sad cycle to be in! I find myself asking the Israelites - "Why? Why would you forsake a God over and over Who has been SO gracious to you?" Why do continue to go back to your own ways when He's proven time after time that your sole joy and satisfaction is in Him?"

Every time I ask those questions, though, I find the Israelites almost screaming back at me from the pages of the Word. "Why do you do it, then? It's the same God, gracious and full of compassion, the One Who continues to show you that He is your sole source of joy and satisfaction. Your sin is no less than ours. Why?"

It's a good question, and I wish I had a good answer other than my own pride, selfishness and sin. I am thankful, though, that Jesus Christ has redeemed me from the eternal curses that my sin deserves. I am thankful that even in my cycle of misery, I have a Savior.

Reverse Culture Shock

It happens every time after I return from a mission trip, and it doesn't matter if it's an overseas trip or if we stayed state-side. There's a culture shock that hits me a few days later right at home when I least expect it.

This morning while worshiping with the body of UBC, I was standing in the choir loft singing my heart out, when I looked around and felt my heart drop. I was enjoying a fellowship so sweet, and yet I had just spent a week with people who would fall into one of the following two categories:

1) They desperately long for a family to worship with each week like that
2) They have no idea of the joy that they are missing

Why do we often treat our blessing of this gathering so casually, when there are millions of people in the world who are longing to share in it? Specifically, why are we meeting without passion when 98.4 percent of New England needs that fellowship?

As I was working through those thoughts, we started singing O the Blood, and then we sang In Christ Alone. I started having faces flash through my mind of those we met and talked with this week. So many people who could not sing the words of those songs honestly, and in many cases probably don't even have a head knowledge of what they mean. I thought specifically of Sham, who when asked how he viewed God, said, "He is gracious." We sang these words:

O what love, no greater love. Grace, how can it be? That in my sin, yes, even then, He shed His blood for me.

THAT is what grace really means! My heart longs for him to know that, to experience that grace in his life, and to fall on his face and worship his Prophet, his Priest, his King! Our own hearts need to be continually gripped by that truth. Our hearts need to deal with that reverse culture shock every day - because this world is not our home. We are living in a foreign culture every single day, and we should live as radically as that makes us feel.

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part VII

It's a late night tonight as I write this, but it has been a full and fruitful day. I'm typing this as I watch the Kentucky basketball game with Ryan, so if there are typos, frequent lapses of focus are the reason. :-)

As I mentioned yesterday, we spent the entirety of the day with Russell and Cynthia again today. They have been so gracious in giving of their time to our team, and we have definitely bonded as friends and in Christian fellowship over the last two days. Russell drove us this morning to a community called New Britton, which is a few minutes southwest of downtown Hartford. There, we toured the campus of Central Connecticut State University. The students there were on Spring Break, so there weren't many people to talk to, but we did find a few student employees working the information desk that were able to give insight on the campus. This is a university founded by members of the Jewish community, and many Jewish students attend here. Naturally, then, there are several different Jewish organizations on the campus.

Central Connecticut State University

The girls at the desk here told us that while there is great outflow from the university to the community through internships, jobs, community service, etc., there is not much of a presence of the community itself on the campus. We asked some leading questions to determine the reason for that, specifically related to the presence of a church or a Christian organization, but they indicated that there is not a great need for that because the university itself provides so many resources to students. Pray that the Lord would raise someone up to penetrate this campus with the Gospel!

After spending some time in conversation with Russell and then prayer walking a bit of the campus, we drove to Storrs, Connecticut, home of the UConn Huskies. The small rural community of Storrs is where Russell and Cynthia live, and they were gracious to invite us into their home for lunch. It was so nice to have simple homemade sandwiches after eating out for a full week!

CCSU Campus (the building on the right is meant
to resemble a lighthouse)

Following our lunch there, we drove to another community called Willimantic, Connecticut. This lower-to-middle-class town is the home of Eastern Connecticut State University (we've covered all but the north and west this week!). Again, the students here were on Spring Break, so we only took time to drive through the campus in order to make some general observations about the surroundings. As was the case yesterday, many of the areas we saw today looked much like Fayetteville, and all three campuses were laid out and had a feel very much similar to the University of Arkansas. If only we could get the temperatures to look the same right about now! Really, though, we've been blessed the last two days with sunny skies, and while still very cool, it's been much more pleasant than it could have been.

The whole day was building our excitement to see the University of Connecticut, and especially for Ryan and me because of the fame of its basketball programs. :-) Before our hosts would take us on campus, though, they forced us to have some of the agriculture department's dairy bar ice cream, which was some of the best I've had. Forced could perhaps be the wrong word here!

Best ice cream in Connecticut!

Russell and Cynthia showed us around the Alumni Center, which is where their church plant, The Bridge, meets every Sunday night. Because this is largely a commuter school, they have found that more students are in town on Sunday night than would be Sunday morning, though they do host a Bible study on Sunday mornings in the Student Union. They have been meeting for three years, and have grown to having 30 attenders on a consistent basis. Russell and Cynthia will be leaving this church at the end of the semester, though, so pray that God would raise up another leader to carry on the work here.

We spent some time seeking out conversations and prayer walking on the campus before heading back to Russell and Cynthia's house, and debriefed with them for a while before dinner. They had invited a few of their church members to join us, and five of them were able to come. We enjoyed so much getting to share with them about how God is leading us as a church, and to hear their hearts about this church and community as well.

A graphic representation of the religious diversity
of the UConn Campus

University of Connecticut

Ryan and I were particularly blessed to share in a few extra moments tonight with Russell and Cynthia, as they gave encouragement to us as a couple in the joys and struggles of a ministry marriage. We were blessed to pray together with them for God's guidance in both couples' lives in the near future. Please pray with us to that end as well.

We'll meet as a team of six tomorrow morning for brunch and a final debrief before leaving Brant and the Northeast as we return home. It's been a great week, and we're eager to see how God works through this team and through UBC as we proceed forward with church planting. Thanks for reading along with us this week! I doubt that I will post anything tomorrow night, as we'll be arriving back in Fayetteville late, but keep watching the blog for future updates on the life of this project and in the life of the Martins!

PS - The Kentucky Wildcats are now in the Elite Eight . . . makes for a very happy ride home tomorrow!

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part VI

Hartford, Connecticut

Today felt like one of our best days yet here in New England. We woke up to enough snow to make the ground pretty, but nothing was on the roads by the time we left at 10:30 - Praise God! With a good deal of rest and renewed energy for our final days here, we set off for Hartford, Connecticut. New Haven was about two hours from Providence, and Hartford is only about 45 minutes from New Haven. The short drives have allowed good opportunity to view the areas surrounding each of these cities, and have provided insights into what a church planting team would encounter while living here (aka - lots of traffic).

Upon arriving in Hartford, we met up with Russell and his wife, Cynthia. They are former IMB missionaries who are now leading a small campus church at UConn. They spent the rest of the day with us, driving us into the downtown area and guiding us on a tour of the close surrounding areas. We found that the downtown area of Hartford differs from Providence and New Haven in that it has more of an upscale look and feel, and it doesn't seem as compact as the others did. You'll find parks and "green space" in the Hartford downtown, whereas the other two cities had much more of an industrial feel. That, combined with suburban areas being closer to downtown here than at our previous stops, made Hartford feel more like Fayetteville to the group.

As we drove through town, we quickly drove through St. Joseph's College (a Catholic campus), and also spent some time at the University of Hartford. The U of H feels very much like the U of A, though on a bit of a smaller scale. Our team paired off in groups of two to prayerwalk the campus, and to seek opportunities for conversation. God graciously provided each team member with at least one of those opportunities, for which we are all very grateful.

The University of Hartford Campus

Personally, Ryan and I were quickly able to meet Sham, a Muslim student from Pakistan. He was reading a pamphlet about the Muslim faith when we met him, which provided an instant opportunity to have a spiritual conversation with him. He shared his beliefs with us openly, and then listened attentively as Ryan shared the Gospel with him as well. Sham is very intelligent and quite knowledgable about his beliefs, but he has no knowledge of the One True God. Please pray that this Truth would be revealed to him! He allowed us to pray for him before we left, and gave Ryan his phone number, so pray also that they will be able to have continued dialogue, and that he will be prompted to think about the things that were shared with him this afternoon.

From that campus, we went to Trinity College, which is a few miles away. This was founded as an Episcopalian college, although the congregational church at the time of its founding forced the college to establish that it would not impose its Episcopalian beliefs upon the students. This holds true today, but the college architecture is full of Catholic-looking symbols. The chapel itself is very beautiful on the outside, but the inside is almost Gothic in appearance and is far from a welcoming place of worship. The students here were on Spring Break, but Brant and Jennifer were able to meet a sophomore rowing student (Chris), who recently became a believer and is desperate for a place to find discipleship and growth in his walk with the Lord. He and Brant also exchanged information, so pray that a relationship can be developed there, and that Chris would find a place to worship with other believers.

Trinity College Chapel

Trinity College Campus

Beautiful architecture at Trinity College

The whole group then met with Joe Fisher, who is in the process of planting a church in the downtown area. He is currently leading a group of about 20, with plans for a more formal initial gathering on Easter Sunday. He shared more valuable information about the community as a whole, and about what church planting would look like in Hartford. From he and all others we have talked to, we have heard that the traditional southern church-planting model just would not work here. Planting a church takes relationships, time, involvement in the community, time, support from your sending church, and time. Pray that this is something that we will be able to clearly communicate to the body of UBC upon our return, as we seek how the process would look for us.

The site of Jonathan Edwards' famous sermon:
"Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God"

Tomorrow, we will spend another day, our final full day in the Northeast, with Russell and Cynthia, who have been so gracious to give up their time to host us here in Hartford. We will spend time in some outlying cities, as well as visiting the UConn campus and meeting some of the members of their church, The Bridge.

Thank you for your continued prayers!

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part V

New England Water (seen through the fog)!

We are now a team of six! Our group is experiencing some new life now that Brant has arrived to join us for the rest of the week. We're grateful to have another guy to round out the team and that he was able to make it safely, considering some of the roads in the Northeast are gathering snow, sleet, etc. On that note, please pray that the conditions won't affect our travel in the morning. As of right now, we should be fine to make it to Hartford, but there could be more significant accumulation overnight. We're allowing ourselves a few extra hours to rest and get ready in the morning, so hopefully a later time of departure will help us as well.

We had our earliest morning yet today, as we met for breakfast with Tim, a Connecticut church planting strategist and pastor. He was able to give us some significant on-paper information about each of our Connecticut areas that will be useful as we look to the right neighborhood in which to plant a church. He spent some time driving us around the city, showing us the University of New Haven and the surrounding suburban areas.

The entrance to Yale

After that, Lauren & Kailey went to survey the Yale campus area, and the rest of us went to the public library in hopes of striking up conversation with locals. God was gracious to provide each one of us with beneficial dialogues with residents of the New Haven community, and we were able to learn much about the spiritual climate of the city.

For lunch, we met with Andy, who is the Director of Collegiate Ministries for the New England Baptist Convention (quite the title!). He shared more specifically about ministering to campuses, which is something we have really focused on as we look to plant another "University Baptist Church," or at least a similar model by another name perhaps.

Yale University Campus

As the day transpired, I was connected through various Facebook avenues with Sarah, who lives in a New Haven suburb with her husband and two children. As it turns out, her in-laws are actually members of UBC, her mom led in Bible Study Fellowship the same I did, and her family is very close to the Brills, who I work with at Lightbearers. Sarah and I were blessed to speak on the phone for quite a while this afternoon while the rest of the team debriefed, and she was able to give a perspective that we hadn't found yet. Again, God has been so gracious to provide timely appointments with specific people who will all be used to direct us toward that place that He has already set before us. What a privilege for us to be a part of that!

Southern Connecticut State University

As another day ends, I continue to ask you to pray for our team. We have now finished our time in two of the three cities, and already we have noticed extreme differences between them. Pray that God will use those differences to make it clear to the Body of UBC where He is preparing for us to be a part of His work. Begin praying, too, for the team that will travel to Boulder, Colorado, and Palo Alto, California, in May, as they survey an additional two cities. As we talk to more and more people, the need is revealing itself as more and more significant. So many we have met openly declare that they have no view of God at all, and that breaks my heart. These people need to have knowledge of a Savior - and not just knowledge - but they need to have a true, lived-out relationship with Him. This task matters!!!

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part IV

We've reached the halfway point in our trip, and it's starting to show. We had another great day of meetings and ministry, but we're tired. Our day started out early, though, so it's warranted. 

We left Providence early this morning and made good time to New Haven. I was expecting one of two things of New Haven, and neither of them was true. First, I thought it would be much more of a suburban town than a big-city kind of place. Well, it's a big-city kind of place. My second option was that it would be a lot like Providence, but that's not really the case either. Both of these cities are similar in size to Fayetteville in population, but they look so different. They're very business-looking, right off of the interstate with lots of high-rise buildings. There's definitely that "inner-city" downtown feel in New Haven, really more so than in Providence.

We arrived in town early for our lunch meeting, so we spent a bit of time driving around the downtown area. It's an atmosphere that is so very unfamiliar to me, and it's hard to know how to react to it. The Yale campus is right in the middle of downtown, but it stands out significantly amongst the high-rise businesses and condos. The buildings are old, classical and full of character. It's really a beautiful little community to itself right in the middle of a big city area. 

We met for lunch with Cat, who is a Young Life coordinator here in New Haven. She is a Yale graduate and has been a resident of the area for the last four years, so she was able to give us a lot of helpful insight into the community as a whole. She expressed that the university and community don't get along well at all, outside of the fact that Yale is the largest employer in the city. Many of the students never leave campus, as our own team members experienced when asking students for simple directions within the city. She also explained the huge diversity that is experienced in the town, as you can find mansions and projects within a couple of blocks of each other. Another big thing she shared with us is that this community does not at all value community. In fact, she said it's a concept completely foreign to many of them. She said that the parents of some of her kids might be neighbors but don't know each other at all. There is a significant need to teach and encourage community living in this area.

We had another hour in between meetings, so we spread out and surveyed the downtown area as much as we could. As was explained in our meeting later, the people here will rarely make eye contact with you on the street, and will hardly ever say hello . . . even if you say hello to them. We all experienced that in our brief time there. We were able to make a couple of contacts during that time, including one woman (a lifetime New Haven resident) who just lost her job and requested prayer from our team. 

Our final meeting was with Greg, an elder at Trinity Baptist Church in New Haven, and a representative of a Christian campus organization at Yale. He shared the story of his church, which meets in the downtown area and has a congregation of 200, and gave some good insight into the best areas to consider planting a church in the future. We were blessed to pray with him for the town and for God's direction as we seek His will for that or another area with UBC. 

Tomorrow will begin early with a breakfast meeting, and will be another full day. Pray that our team can rest well again and that we can all remain healthy for the duration of the trip. Brant will be joining us tomorrow evening, so pray also for his safe travel as he drives up from the New Jersey area.

Unfortunately, I didn't get any pictures of the New Haven area today, but I was able to get the pictures from previous days to post correctly, so go back and check those out!

Today's only picture...and the view from our hotel window

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part III

The outline for today's update is easy: University, Rain, Dunkin' Donuts, Scary Man, Snow, Lunch Meeting, University, Snow, Rain, Snow, Rain, Meeting, Dinner, Dessert, COLD!

Plotting out the day's plans

1. We began the morning at Johnson & Wales University, one of the top culinary schools in the country (though not only a culinary school). This is the school that Grace Harbor Church has the most relationship with, and where one of their elders serves as college ministry director. We were hoping to get to talk with several students and faculty members there, but the school is locked down pretty tight, so that wasn't really an option. The college students on our team were able to make a couple of brief connections, though, and we're grateful for that.

Johnson & Wales Campus

2. Since we couldn't get on campus and because it had started raining, Ryan and I walked over to a corner Dunkin' Donuts (there's really almost one on every corner) to get warm drinks and to spark up conversation with another customer or two. There, we met Ming, an architecture student from Taiwan. We spoke to Ming for quite a while, and quickly learned that he didn't know much about Christianity at all. Ryan brought the conversation to the Gospel, but Ming didn't seem to want to delve any further into that discussion. Please pray for this young man, who plans to return to his home country when he graduates in 2-3 years.

3. Homelessness is a huge need in this city, and that was apparent to us as we walked around downtown. In fact, right before we walked into the donut shop, a man asked us for money. We didn't give him any, and he proceeded to follow us into the donut shop and then followed us out when we left. I must admit, he scared me a bit, so we walked away quickly and tried to avoid him the rest of the morning, something I now somewhat regret. What if I was homeless? Would I want to be treated like that?

4. Before meeting up with the rest of our team again, it began to snow. It was really windy in the downcity area this morning, so the snow was blowing right at our faces. We were definitely missing the 70-degree temperatures at home!

Brown University Bears

5. For lunch, we met with Ted, who pastors another church, Downcity Church, in...well, downcity. He's a single guy living in the city, who is extremely passionate about reaching these people for Christ. He's been there for four years now and leads a congregation of about 40 members. As did our meetings yesterday, this provided yet another great time of conversation and learning about church planting. One of the key things I took from our meeting personally was that in the life of a beginning church planter, he is the go-to-guy for anyone with any issues, questions, concerns, etc. Until the church has grown enough to install deacons and elders, the church planter must be prepared to focus a lot of time and effort on the congregation.

Brown University Main Green

6. Parking is not a good option in this city, so you try to find a good spot at the beginning of the day and then walk mostly everywhere you go. From lunch, we walked (in the snow) to Brown University, about two miles or so up from the downcity area. We spent the rest of the afternoon meeting with students and staff members, surveying them for the spiritual needs of the campus and community. We found a great need for an international student ministry, as people from all of the world come to this school, but many have a hard time getting plugged in. While this campus does have a small presence from a local evangelical church, there is still much that could be done to reach these students.

7. Snow, rain, snow, rain...you know the drill.

Downcity Providence

8. We met in the campus bookstore with Tyler, who is a leading member of one of the Christian organizations on campus. He shared with us a lot about the student body, and provided a good perspective that we hadn't yet received. Tyler explained that Brown University is a constant promoter of tolerance and non-judgmental relationships, which he said allows you to present your faith on campus, although they may just be tolerant of your ideas and may not necessarily be receptive.

9. We ended the evening with a good team debrief dinner and dessert. Providence seems to have a thing with huge desserts. For those who might come to the area in the future, I recommend ordering one serving and requesting several spoons.

The First Baptist Church in America
(founded by Roger Williams)

10. Pray for us tonight as we warm up and rest. We'll be heading out early in the morning for New Haven, Connecticut. The weather looks to be better tomorrow, which we are looking forward to. We have two different meetings scheduled with campus ministry/church directors, so pray that those meetings are informative and fruitful. Thanks!

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part II

The capitol building in Providence
(seen by all four angles tonight, thanks to our GPS!)

It's been a very busy day for our team today in Providence, Rhode Island. Before I give you details on that, though, I want to write about our meeting last night with a church planter.

We met Rafael H. at a local "hot-spot" restaurant in Providence last night. I think we were all a bit nervous about our first official meeting with a local church-planter, but we quickly figured out who would lead the conversation and how to engage with each other. It couldn't have been a better meeting to begin the week with. Rafael has been a church planter for more than 30 years, and has been in this area for just about as long. As a result, he had a wealth of information to give us about church-planting in Rhode Island and Connecticut. One of the first bits of info he gave us was the following:

1.6 percent of New England is evangelical. The IMB classifies anything less than 2 percent evangelized as an unreached people group.

This statistic came up again today and has really impacted us as a team. If you consider these populations to be unreached people groups, it really means that a church planter has to be considered a missionary. More on that a few words later . . .

It seemed that with any area or city that we asked Rafael about, he would answer, "Yes, that would be a very good place to plant a church. Mmhmm." There are so few churches - Biblical churches - in these cities, and the need is great.

Our study at Grace Harbor on Wisdom v. Folly
in Proverbs 9

That information was only confirmed today, as we experienced our first full day in the city. We attended worship services at Grace Harbor Baptist Church, pastored by Kevin McCay. We so enjoyed our time there with a group of about 70 brothers and sisters in Christ. Kevin and one of the church elders, Travis, shared with us that this church plant is considered the "success story" of Providence. They've been a church plant for about seven years, but it has only really taken off within the last two (which is when Kevin & Travis arrived). They meet in a board room of a downtown (or "downcity," as they call it) hotel, but the unusual atmosphere did nothing to dampen their joy in meeting to worship the Lord. Many of the members were eager to welcome us to their congregation, and shared with us their appreciation of the familial and community feel of the church. Their love for each other and for the city was very evident. We saw a special aspect of this congregation, when later in the day we were at a local coffee shop, and saw a church member sharing the Gospel with his homosexual boss, who has recently become open to hearing about the Lord. God is doing a great work in and through these people, and we were blessed to be a part of it this morning.

Downcity Providence
(and the Ghostbusters building, I hear?)

The craziest thing that happened today was by far one of those "small world" moments. As we were preparing for the beginning of services, another Spring Break college group walked in, and they happened to be from Union University in Tennessee, which is where Ryan graduated college. Leading that team was a couple that he was great friends with during school, and it was a neat treat for them to see each other three years later in Providence of all places!

After the service, we had lunch downtown with Kevin and Travis, who shared more about their work and answered many of our questions about church-planting in the area. They restated many of the things we heard from Rafael, but also provided new insights, such as information about specific campuses, other churches in the area,etc. They were the ones to really bring out the idea of sending a missionary rather than a church planter, and shared with us what that means for the church back home.

"Church planting is a marathon; not a sprint. The church needs to look their man in the eyes and say, 'You're our guy. We're completely behind you and trust you to do the job well. We're committed to you and to the city for the long haul. It will probably take 7-10 years, but we're in it for that long. Unless you come and tell us that the Lord is moving you or the church plant elsewhere, we're there."

That really stood out to our team tonight, especially as we studied together in 2 Corinthians 4. "Therefore, we do not lose heart." Church planting is not an easy task, especially in the northeast, but it needs to be done. Wherever the Lord leads us, we as a church body at UBC will have to make this much more than a passing interest, but a long-time committed endeavor.

Our home at Providence College?

We spent the rest of the day exploring the city, specially Providence College, where we were able to interview several different individuals for our community survey. We're excited to begin gathering a lot of information, and enjoy debriefing on each of those conversations together at the end of every day.

Providence College - Catholic Chapel

Please continue to pray for us. Travel in these cities is hard on our own with only a cantankerous GPS to get us around. Pray that the forecasted light snow for tomorrow would remain light. Pray that we would find the right areas to survey tomorrow (our last full day in Providence) and that God would lead us to the right people to talk to. Pray that each member of our team would understand and embrace our specific roles, and that we would work well together as we go. Pray that God would begin to give us clear discernment as to where He might lead us to plant a church, and that we would be prepared to communicate that effectively to those at UBC. Once again, pray for the unreached people groups of Providence, New Haven and Hartford!

Our Adventure in the Northeast - Part I

Our bulging suitcases

Almost a year ago, Ryan began developing a prospectus for church planting at UBC. What began as an idea written down on paper has now grown into an adventure for Ryan, myself and four others in the northeastern United States. During Spring Break, we will be spending time in Providence, Rhode Island, and Hartford and New Haven, Connecticut. During our eight days in those towns, we will meet with local church planters, pastors and campus leaders to get a scope for the current evangelical presence in these specific areas. We will also spend time walking the streets, driving the neighborhoods and hopefully sparking conversations with local members of the community, with a desire that what we see and hear will give a clear picture of the spiritual needs of focused areas of these three cities. Our prayer is that God will use that information to help us clearly identify whether He would have UBC plant a church in the near future in one of these areas. 

Five of the six members of our team drove to Tulsa yesterday. Brant, our sixth member, will be joining us on Wednesday - an event Ryan is ready for considering right now he is the only male representative on the team! We had a 6:00am flight out of Tulsa this morning, and were blessed with the hospitality of Trey & Kristen Richardson and her parents, who provided us with a home for the night near the airport. The alarm clock woke us up at 3:45am, which was WAY too early, but it was nice to arrive in Rhode Island early in the day. After getting on the plane headed to Detroit, it took me about 45 minutes to get adjusted to the idea of being 20,000 feet in the air (this happens EVERY time I get on a plane), but thankfully our flights were smooth and the weather was great, with the exception of 32-degree temperatures on the breezeway in Detroit. 

Speaking of weather, pray that it's favorable for us this week as we drive from city to city. There's a chance of slight snow on two or three of the days, and we would hate for that to interfere with any of our meetings or time in the city. If it does snow, though, Ryan and I are prepared. We were the only ones to bring a carry-on bag AND a checked bag, probably because we brought so many sweaters, heavy coats and scarves. :-)

Mission Trip Multi-Tasking 

After finally getting our fancy rental Yukon (we're high-rolling it this week!), we made it to our hotel, which is actually in Massachusetts. The hotel itself is not so high-rolling, but it fit the budget and is quite comfortable when you're living off of four hours of sleep. We made it just in time to watch the last part of the first half of Kentucky's basketball game, and then found lunch in time to see the end of the second half. We're now checking up on our brackets to find out who to cheer for in the rest of the games this afternoon. 

Our first church-planter meeting is tonight, so we're all getting rested up for that before dinner. We're all excited to get into the "meat" of the week and to see how God works in our team, in our individual lives and in the future of our church. He is definitely at work in each of these three cities, and it is our desire to see what part He might have us play in that as He continues to bring glory to Himself through these people and in these places. 

Please pray to that end with us this week - pray for protection as we travel; pray for the Gospel to be evident in our words, our actions and on our faces; pray for unity and fellowship within our team; pray for us to ask the right questions of those that we meet; pray for divine appointments; pray for clear vision and direction; pray for Hartford, Providence and New Haven!

As a complete side note, here are a couple of observations about the Northeast (and/or areas between there and Fayetteville):

- Lake Erie is much bigger than the lakes around Fayetteville.
- Traffic is way too congested. Going for a "short drive down this road" is not an option.
- It's still exciting to see a Walmart, even when you've lived next to one your whole life.
- There is an Indian Pow Wow happening in the conference room of our hotel. The Blue Cloud Moon Tribe is fun to watch.
- The Providence airport REALLY likes the moving sidewalks. Twenty minutes of them just to get a rental car.